Falling Down the Rabbit Hole

These past few months have been absolutely nothing but hectic for me with family commitments as well as work with little time to myself and my fitness (including keeping you lot updated!). Slowly but surely, I feel like Alice…or Alex in my case, falling down the rabbit hole and into the strange and unreal world of Wonderland where everything is upside down crazy.

Of course, this post isn’t just me moaning, groaning or bitching but it’s rather about telling harsh truths and being honest and I have always been honest with you. I have probably lost quite a few readers due to me not updating this as much as I would love to and I sincerely apologise for it. However, today has been a major wake-up call for me to take action, get my life back on track and do something before it’s too late.

Today, I weighed myself…okay, I hear everybody telling me to measure my body but hear me out…I weighed myself today because I knew I had put on inches around my stomach and my chest and possibly my waist so I deemed it pointless to measure until I kick-start myself again. What I read on the scales horrified me:

18st 7lb

Wait, what? No! This can’t be right. I laugh to myself and I try again.

18st 7lb

Maybe the scales are totally wrong. I expected a few pound but not over half a stone!

18st 7lb

Well, shit a brick! I’ve put too much weight on! I felt upset, I felt ashamed of myself and I was angry at myself. See, I have another confession to make…I’ve been stress-eating to the extent that it’s slightly got out of hand. Over the last few months, I’ve eaten chocolate, fish and chips, cakes, biscuits and quite honestly, I’ve not cared. The reason is because I needed something that made me happy and it’s just like I’ve always told you lot: Once you get into that vicious cycle of stress-eating to feel happy, you also feel the guilty side too so you eat to feel happy and then you feel bad…it goes on, much like superhero films.

Anyway, I don’t condone it and I definitely don’t have any excuses for what I’ve done but in all honesty, I have had a legitimate reason. Something very bad has happened and I’ve dealt with it in a bad way in the sense that I’ve put my health and fitness at risk. I’ve stopped exercising and I’ve eaten crap and pretty much undone all of my hard work to the point that I am now typing to you, weighing the heaviest I have weighed in a very long time.

But this is what I needed. I needed to weigh myself today to finally see what I am doing to myself. This has been one major wake-up call that I need to stop wallowing, getting upset and I need to start focusing again! I need to do it no matter what!

Life is a cruel, harsh thing but it can also be great. I guess it all depends on how you look at it. Sometimes you need to be knocked down to see how you can get back up. Right now, I have been winded and kicked in the bollocks for many reasons but the question I faced today is do I stay down struggling to breathe with sore balls or do I stand back up, dust myself off and fight the mugs who tried to beat me down?

It’s time for Alex to crawl out of the Rabbit Hole. Wonderland looks like a bag of stinking shit!